Are you ready? What is 248 + 399+129+20+525? Ok, right now you might be grabbing a calculator, using the old fashion paper and pencil, thinking “whatever”, or like me when I see numbers, “Ugh!” One of the benefits of studying social work in college and in graduate school is that it narrowed down the amount of math I needed to take. What a bonus!
In reality tough, sometimes it is so much easier to calculate numbers than to calculate risk. Here are two simple and upfront examples.
My family took a road trip to head back where my husband and I were raised, the good old midwest, Chicago. We stopped in a small town in Oklahoma based on the promise of the billboards on the highway telling us we couldn’t miss this little town. Well, with tummies rumbling and our eyes about ready to turn yellow, we drove up and down the main street of this little town. After about 5 minutes we soon realized that this little street was not going to offer us the reprieve we needed.
Minutes later we are in line at a Subway in a gas station. The guy behind the counter was probably in his early twenties and thankful to have this job, considering that the main street of this town was mostly empty. While in the middle of placing our order a woman comes up to the counter, not looking very happy, and questions if the man behind the counter has her ID and the paper with her pin number. This poor guy’s face turned red, he gave a quick answer (I couldn’t hear what he said) and then he continued on making our sandwich. The woman continued to stand there and didn’t look happy. I started to question how upset she could actually get. At one point I was going to tell the young man that he could take care of his business before making our next sandwich, but then I thought what if this situation escalates, so I decided to move on with our sandwiches. I minute later the woman storms out.
Later that day as we were unloading our car in Missouri, our stay for the night, a big guy, like linebacker size, approaches us in the parking lot. Let me set the scene first. We are at the back side of this hotel, in the dark and no one is around but us and this big dude. The man pulled into a parking space a couple of cars away from us, got out and approached my husband by putting his hand out and introducing himself while also pointing out his wife in the car. He started to explain that he was traveling from some small town in Missouri and that is about as far as he got before my husband said, “I’d rather you just leave us alone.” Fortunately the man was okay with the request and headed back to his car.
I wonder if he had a legitimate story. Was he intending to ask for money? If he would have gotten further in his story I probably would have paid the guy off by giving him twenty bucks so we could all move on our merry way. My husband was too smart for this guy. In a minute Charles calculated the risk involved and responded. I think the question in Charles’ mind was, “Why would this man pull his car to the back of a hotel to ask for assistance? There are plenty more people down the road at the gas station, hence increasing this guys odds, compared to this dark lit parking lot behind the hotel.”
The calculation of risk is something we all battle with on a daily basis. Should I cross traffic now, or wait for that car to go by? Do I let my son sleepover at a friend’s house who I don’t really know? Do I let my daughter climb across the monkey bars by herself or do I hold on? Do we use this new babysitter? Should I ask for a raise? Is this the time to change jobs? Do I really tell them how I feel? What if I don’t follow though on something? Money is tight, what if I don’t pay this bill this month? Etc.
There are also risks when someone involves themselves in risky behaviors such as drugs, alcohol, promiscuity, high risks activities like sky diving and all of those other adrenaline seeking activities.
Why do we calculate risk? Because we know there are consequences to everything. Babies learn this at a young age when they hurt themselves for the first time. From that moment on, it may be subtle or almost subconscious at times, but their life no longer has the innocence it once had.
The bottom line is that we all have our threshold of how risky we allow ourselves to be and how much at risk we will allow our children to be placed in. Oftentimes I think our gut reaction tells us what we should do, but more often I think we are placed with having to calculate the risk at hand. Sometimes we have time to stew it over while other times like in the parking lot we have to add it up as quickly as possible.
Maybe the calculation of math equations isn’t so challenging after all.
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